thanking u

Do you get it or should I make it more clear to you genius?

Oh pardon my not so intellectual language. It gets to the point.

Dr. Helen, please note this conclusion for future reference, and that it turns out that at least one meaningful lesson here, in addition to any others, is clearly that men in north america should not marry at all, period.

1. You are an earner with a future.
2. She gains an introduction to you after you have been vetted by her advisors (i.e, girlfriends)
3. She meets you for coffee with a Wall Street Journal under her arm and a copy of Homer’s Iliad. She discusses world politics and chess theory
4. She hints at great sexual desire for you and soon she has you in bed – the sex is great and she does the oral sex thing as often as you want it
5. Going against your gut instinct you propose
6. Her mother stresses that their family opposes long engagements
7. The wedding date is set and its over – your head is spinning
8. Honeymoon sex was good including one oral encounter
9. New house is bought
10. She presses for a kid and becomes pregnant
11. You notice she never reads a book and she doesn’t follow the market, only your joint bank account, and is clueless about what is going on in the world
12. Another kid – kids are being trained that you are incompetent and irrelevant as a father
13. No oral is three years – sex is once a month whether you need it or not
14. Kids look to you for ice cream and periodic zoo visit – she complains its too much walking (she has gained some weight which you never mention)
15. Begin thinking of exit strategy but feel guilty, raised not to divorce, and worried about relationship with kids
16. Its too much – you leave home to figure it out. Kids are told you are the bad guy. Advisors give her names of top ball-cutting lawyers
17. You get a legal notice that she filed
18. You scramble for a lawyer – you are a man so you get hosed on kids and money
19. You pay through the nose while she brainwashes the kids that you abandoned them and are an asshole.
20. You do your best to make ends meet and to maintain some relationship with your kids – she continues to harass you in every way possible – its her sport and joy
21. You move to Tahiti and move in with a native beauty who can’t speak english, has no desire to get married, and likes sex with you, including oral
22. You are happy and as kids get older they seek you out.
23. Your ex is on number 3 and still consulting with her advisors most of whom have also been divorced twice
24. Your kids move to tahiti after realizing what a witch their mother is
25. She flies to TAhiti to confront you on kids – your girlfriend, daughter of the chief, has her disappeared – and you avoid the cookout the following night

This was a letter he wrote before taking his life:

On October 17th, 1995, Andre Renouf decided that life was not worth living. He took his last few cents and
purchased enough rope to hang himself. He wrote the following suicide note the day before he took his own life. While the media and government love to create the “deadbeat dad” demon, the truth more often than not is stories like Andre’ Renouf’s. Suicide and homelessness after family break up is very common for men, however Stats Canada refuses to release any statistics on these epidemics.

Bill Whatcott
————————————————————————————

A.T. Renouf
7470 Ninth Line,
Markham, Ont. L6B 1A8

16-October-1995

To Whom It May Concern

Last Friday (13-October) My bank account was garnisheed. I was left with a total of $00.43 in the bank.

At this time I have rent and bills to pay which would come to somewhere approaching $1500.00 to $1800.00.

Since my last pay was also direct deposited on Friday I now have no way of supporting myself. I have no money for food or for gas for my car to enable me to work. My employer also tells me that they will only pay me by direct deposit. I therefore no longer have a job, since the money would not reach me.

I have tried talking to the Family Support people at 1916 Dundas St. E. Their answer was: ”we have a court order,” repeated several times.

I have tried talking to the welfare people in Markham.

Since I earned over $520.00 last month I am not eligible for assistance. I have had no contact with my daughter in approx. 4 years. I do not even know if she is alive and well. I
have tried to keep her informed of my current telephone number but she has never bothered to call. I have no family and no friends, very little food, no viable job and very poor future prospects. I have therefore decided that there is no further point in continuing my life. It is my intention to drive to a secluded area, near my home, feed the car exhaust into the car, take some sleeping pills and use the remaining gas in the car to end my life. I would have preferred to die with more dignity. It is my last will and testament that this letter be published for all to see and read.

Signed

A.T. Renouf

It’s a hoot in a professional environment when you get a mommy colleague who expects her co-workers to obey her micro-managing the same way her children do. You just know that these women would like to reach over and cut your steak for you at lunch, because that’s how they’re used to behaving.