Pajamas Media

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Dude, it’s these feelings of senselessness of purpose mixed with equal parts introjections therapy and hamburger Gestalt Helper, now with knuckles and femurs, that like attempting logical discourse with the gop, party of the dim and brainless, leaves one not only with that incomplete victory dint but a plummeting of one’s hope. And just like a voyage of innovation unto unexplored territory, I remember the first time I tried to have a stab at treatise with a local inbred “teabagger” that left me with more of an absurd melancholy, as if I just opened an owl pellet. What a world of discovery! I had stumbled across a Mother lode one Fall afternoon while skipping along the banks of the river Dung, feeling sanguinity for this country. But alas, this poorly prepared dead end of humanity must have just tuned out from his local pinhead conservative commentator, because apparently this “knowledgeable” pundit has dispensed all the naughty bits of dried up illogic, and it did this disgusting and unsightly business away from the prying eyes or our lard, and the sum total of his “talking points” no more than a small pile of damp, furry boluses (soft masses of chewed food). I tried to examine each one, picking them up and carefully placing them out in the open where the light of reason (in his case – a penlight) could result in a voyage of discovery for this pathetic mug, perhaps stir the long ago stagnant synapses in his brain pan, for before that, what use had he of such underused apparatus. But my patience and carefully fostered mental powers were not tough enough to survive the long gestation betwixt intelligible talking points, and the eternal torment and suffering me and my loved ones were now damned to eternity for, as essentially I attempted to make a European carryall from the proverbial sow’s ear. But then I said screw it and put on “Cranked up really high” by Slaughter and the Dogs and awaited Sister Ann Daniel with a handy 5 iron and an uncontrollable urge to tee off her cranium, in the teabagger’s honor.