95 Comments

1. uranari:

Roger,

Just a clarification. You wrote, “…playing S&M horsey games out of every other manga comic book in Shinjuku.” That should be “every third manga book in Shinjuku.” At least by my research.

I’m sure Pelosi will sit the neophyte down and give her a good tongue lashing (continuing with the theme), explaining that hearsay can no longer be used if you actually visit a place, and how detrimental her curiousity is to the aims of the party.

Enjoyed your story Roger, though I usually hate hearing about someones integrity. But it being Hollywood, in this case, it was rather refreshing. Was that why Eddie had to start doing those Dr. Doolittle movies?

Jun 26, 2005 - 11:04 pm 2. Buddy Larsen:

John Hinderacker closes: “The Democrats’ attack on the military through the proxy of Guantanamo Bay has been a fiasco for them, domestically, at least–abroad, it has contributed to anti-Americanism and made the administration’s task more difficult. Here at home, the Democrats are now, to employ their mantra, moving on.”

Will those people in government and media now apologize to their protectors, express regret at having revitalized the shooting bombing enemy, and insure that the truth goes out to every ear that heard the lies? “Nah, would if we could, but, heh heh, y’know how it is, a card laid is a card played.”

Soooo…down it goes, to blend with the hundred previous Party-amping people-frauding once-a-month conspiracies already fermenting brim-full in their dank overheated stygian bedlam of a Hieronymous Bosch Memory Hole.

Jun 26, 2005 - 11:12 pm 3. uranari:

What Buddy said.

But whereas before I thought this game by the Dems and MSM might yield returns, but diminising returns as time wore on, now I’m not so sure. They are going to get destroyed in 2006. Most of America’s true allies are still aboard and the faux pas allies are in retreat. Hasn’t everyone, and I mean everyone, pretty much made up their minds by now. Besides Andrew Sullivan who is trying to figure out a way to support Dukakis and Dole and Gore so as to become a true independent.

Jun 26, 2005 - 11:23 pm 4. uranari:

diminishing (the shame)

Jun 26, 2005 - 11:25 pm 5. Buddy Larsen:

Uranari, just tonight watched Kurosawa’s last project, the finished-by-his-son “The Sea is Watching”…of course I had to make do with subtitles but lucky you, you can experience it fully. What a strange otherworldly film–I loved it–there a half dozen actresses each more beautiful than the others–how’d they DO that?

Jun 26, 2005 - 11:29 pm 6. uranari:

faux pas–faux (though I like faux pas in this case). Sorry about the bandwidth Roger.

Jun 26, 2005 - 11:29 pm 7. Buddy Larsen:

ooo–eyelids just slammed shut–1:30 AM here in Texas–later, alligator!

Jun 26, 2005 - 11:32 pm 8. uranari:

Buddy,

Haven’t seen it myself. Shamefully, I admit. Too busy reading all these old Japanese books which are also beautiful. But maybe this weekend I’ll have that Kurosawa film festival I’ve been promising myself.

About the beautiful actresses? You’ll have to come to Kyoto for me to explain, or rather show you, the how of that.

Jun 26, 2005 - 11:34 pm 9. Tom Grey - Liberty Dad:

The Dems are over-critical, and it’s actually killing our troops. By supporting anti-Americanism.

I suggest the US-led Coalition of countries with troops in Iraq, try to set up an International Coalition prison examination board.

To look at Gitmo, Abu Ghraib, and all military prisons; possibly even national prisons. Develop some criteria and rate the prisons. I’m sure Gitmo would be among the best.

Unreal Perfection is not an option. Critics need to be called on it.

Jun 26, 2005 - 11:57 pm 10. Rob Thompson:

Regarding Ms. Tauscher’s comment – I don’t believe this is anywhere near as revealing as you say; it’s simply a way to leave some spin room.

What I believe is being said is: “Our pressure on the Bush administration has led them to clean up Guantanamo – we were right all along.”

Jun 27, 2005 - 3:02 am 11. maria horvath:

The Daily Telegraph, on the goings-on at Gulag Guantanamo:

“The [American] politicians witnessed interrogations, inspected cells and ate the same lunch of chicken with orange sauce, rice and okra given to detainees.

“They watched interrogators grilling three individual terror suspects including one session where a female interrogator took the unusual approach to wear down a detainee ? reading a Harry Potter book aloud for hours.

“The detainee turned his back and put his hands over his ears.”

Jun 27, 2005 - 4:24 am 12. Terrye:

I disagree Rob, their trip and Durbin’s remarks are only days apart. That would not be time to get rid of the gas chambers and crematorium.

For a party that worries so much about whether the world loves us the Democrats and their supporters like Micheal Moore and Shulz from Amnesty International have no problem trashing this country.

And we all pay, but none of us so much as the soldiers.

I wonder if AI has spent nearly as much time on the fate of the democracy students in China as they have on the fate of AlQaida terrorists in Cuba? Or if they have done as many reports on forced starvation in North Korea as they have death row inmates in the US.

I wonder if Michael Moore will ever do a movie like Submission on the role of women in Islam to balance out F911.

of course not.

Jun 27, 2005 - 4:26 am 13. David Thomson:

ìI wonder if Michael Moore will ever do a movie like Submission on the role of women in Islam to balance out F911.î

Michael Moore? How does he rate next to Steven Spielberg? It appears that the latter gentleman may be directing a film which slams Israel:

ìIn the preface to “Vengeance,” author George Jonas declares himself a supporter of Israel. But according to at least one member of Spielberg’s cast, Daniel Craig, the screenplay is a less-than-flattering portrayal of Israeli tactics.

“It’s about how vengeance doesn’t … work — blood breeds blood,” Craig told entertainment magazine Empire.î

http://entertainment.tv.yahoo.com/entnews/va/20050625/111975898700.html

Jun 27, 2005 - 5:22 am 14. richard mcenroe:

Spielberg’s political opinions on anything are open to challenge every since his little frottage with Castro. I’m strongly thinking about giving War of the Worlds a pass, since these buffoons don’t need the validation.

Jun 27, 2005 - 6:40 am 15. richard mcenroe:

And besides, obviously these deluded lackeys of the system were taken to the special FAKE Gitmo Our Dark Master Karl had built on the other side of the island as a decoy…

Jun 27, 2005 - 7:36 am 16. Stacy's Mom:

Okra?!!

Shut the place down!

Jun 27, 2005 - 7:44 am 17. Buddy Larsen:

I’m sorry, Stacey’s Mom, but you really need to re-examine your position on Gitmo. It’s pickled beets that should shut it down.

Jun 27, 2005 - 8:04 am 18. Buddy Larsen:

Richard is right, they actually saw Potemkin Gitmo, or “PoMo”.

Jun 27, 2005 - 8:14 am 19. kynna:

Okra is a human rights violation. The dems truly are blind.

I enjoyed the story of your pitch, Roger and the idea sounds perfect for an Eddie Murphy movie. It’s admirable that you decided it wasn’t worth it to create a reality so different from the truth for a couple of Hollywood $$.

Gitmo is probably the nicest place these terrorists have ever lived.

I love the part about the guy covering his ears when the female guard reads Harry Potter to him. That’s a great book to read to them as they’d be drawn into the story and wonder what hijynx that Harry, Hermione and Ron were getting into next. Such imaginings would kill the soul of a terrorist.

Jun 27, 2005 - 8:19 am 20. PJ:

I thought it quite delicious that DOD whisked them down to Gitmo not more than a day after their shameful anti-military hearing, to feed off the news cycle and watch them EAT CROW. “Oops, I guess they’ve improve things down here…”

I hope they got a good meal down there with lots of OKRA–with plenty of that runny phlegm stuff all over the plate!

Jun 27, 2005 - 8:24 am 21. Hogarth:

Richard is right, they actually saw Potemkin Gitmo, or “PoMo”.

Then allow me to be the first to propose this demonstration chant:

No Mo’ Faux Gitmo! No Mo’ Faux Gitmo!

Jun 27, 2005 - 8:25 am 22. Kyda Sylvester:

Another great Hollywood yarn, Roger. I applaud you for giving up the project on discovering the truth–something that, I’m thinkin’, doesn’t happen all that often on your side of the street–but indulge me a while longer as I smile (behind my hand of course) at a belief that even white collar prisons with upscale clienteles could in any way, shape or form resemble a country club. Where-oh-where do liberals come up with such ideas?!

A significant number of the people who represent us are imbeciles, but then we already knew that. The bigger problem is their delusional contempt for reality. “The Guantanamo we saw today is not the Guantanamo we heard about a few years ago.” “What we’ve seen here is evidence that we’ve made progress.” Not even the merest nod to the notion that perhaps, just perhaps, what they “heard about a few years ago” was just plain wrong. Idiots. (Do you ever wonder what Christine Aguilera and JK Rowlings must think when they read that their creative output is being employed as an instrument of torture?) Well, maybe now they’ll all STFU for a nanosecond (on this subject at least).

Veering off topic to a subject near and dear: The NYT editorializes today about the plans for Ground Zero (a story, I’m pleased to add, that is finally getting some traction). The editors think we’re disserving history and the very idea of freedom: It’s meant to remember the lives of those who died there, lives that were rich, complex and politically and culturally divided.

What those lives stand for now is American freedom, in its full implication and all its contradictions. The last sentence just about says it all: But it will be the worst of bad beginnings to turn it into a place where only grief is acceptable, where the vital impulses represented by the arts are handcuffed in the name of freedom. Surprised? Anyone?

Jun 27, 2005 - 8:34 am 23. erp:

Roger, this may be a bit off topic, but your idea of a film about a country club prison is a good one, if the reality is too grim, write it as a comedy.

Jun 27, 2005 - 8:36 am 24. Morgan:

I like okra.

Jun 27, 2005 - 8:37 am 25. Rick Ballard:

Tauscher was my representative until I asked Karl to change the districts to put me in the red. She is a moderate Dem and as such represents the “silent majority” of the Democratic caucus. The ones sitting in relatively safe seats that are still susceptible if a very strong wind comes up.

I imagine that we will see a few more moderate Dems doing a walkback from the song sung by Dicky and the Guantanamorons. The lyrics may appeal to the SBL, Ltd. crowd but the majority just can’t dance to it. Rather, they can’t dance to it and keep their jobs.

Let’s see. On the one hand I could believe Dicky and the terrorist symps backed by representatives of the American Communist Lawyer’s Union, on the other I could believe representatives of the Armed Forces of the United States. Boy, tough choice.

Jun 27, 2005 - 8:38 am 26. ahem:

The AP article only highlights what we already know: the Dems don’t actually mean what they say about Gitmo. At least, not the ones that are awake. They just say it for effect. It’s propaganda designed to discredit the Republicans before the next election. But it’s desperate propaganda, seditious propaganda that’s helping to kill our troops. It fans the flames of our enemies and brainwashes those among us who are too lazy to do our own thinking. The Democrat demagogues and cynics who’re using it to undermine us must be denounced.

We really have to start standing up to this crap before we lose our country.

Also, let’s promise to stop calling the Democrats ‘liberals.’ They’re not at all liberal. The Democratic party has been taken over by extreme Leftists traveling under the name of ‘Progressive’. I’d venture to guess that a good number of the people reading this blog are truly liberals. Real liberals started voting Republican at the last election. Those who were at first hesistant will follow.

The platform of the Progressives is a symptom of decadence, based on pessimism and self-loathing. It’s a fundamentally suicidal philosophy. If you need proof, read the egregious article by Michael Ignatieff that appeared in yesterday’s NYT: “Who Are Americans to Think That Freedom Is Theirs to Spread?” Take a brown paper sack with you.

Oh, as a person with gumbo running through my blood stream, I object to good okra being wasted on terrorists…

Jun 27, 2005 - 8:50 am 27. Buddy Larsen:

Rick, I have a title if you can do the lyrics, melody is “Guantanamera”, new title is “Guantana Moron“…the original chorus (English part) was something like “I am a truthful man*from the land of the Palm trees*I share the poetry of my soul* etcetera….

Can’t remember more without going to Google Lyrics–where I’ll get lost and waste the morning. Yet another oppressive threat from Amerika!

Jun 27, 2005 - 9:18 am 28. Buddy Larsen:

ahem–I grew up in Lafayette, Louisiana–you got dat right about dat gumbo!

Jun 27, 2005 - 9:23 am 29. Rick Ballard:

Guanatana Morons might be more precise. We need some help from Spanish speakers to get the chorus right. “Yo soy un hombre ?”

Jun 27, 2005 - 9:30 am 30. Knucklehead:

Stacey’s Mom,

I gotta go with Buddy on this one. Okra can be prepared to yield a quite tasty dish. There’s no hope, on the other hand, of doing anything to make pickled beets palatable.

Jun 27, 2005 - 9:38 am 31. Joseph (formerly Samuel):

Roger

At least when you realized reality didn’t fit your story you didn’t seek to twist it until it did (all to justify self and satisfy personal prejudice), you no longer insisted on making the movie! What we are talking about is much more serious and as such much more egregious.

Then again some of us did not twist a post 911 world to fit our pre 911 prejudices either, and the degree in which one shows capable of avoiding such traps is the degree in which they truly can be trusted.

Joseph Samuel Friedman

Jun 27, 2005 - 9:42 am 32. Joseph (formerly Samuel):

Terrye

I always love the edge to your writing. I was talking to my father, the only non Bush voting family member who gets what is happening to the Democrats. You truly fit his descriptions of the patriotic Red State Democrat that is just getting shut out of the Democratic Party buy such lunacy. My father hopes it will all pass, but if it is a sin to wish then I would say he is in trouble.

Jun 27, 2005 - 10:01 am 33. Ray Zacek:

Imdb.com lists playwright Tony Kushner (”Angels in America”) as screenwriter on that Spielberg project about Israel and Kushner is a shrill leftist who regards Ariel Sharon as a war criminal (and GWB as the embodiment of Evil) and was simply hysterical when the U.S. pulled out of the UN Conference in Durban (the South African city not the Illinois senator) several years ago in response to its virulent anti Israell propaganda. If Kushner crafts the narrative of the screen play I think one can presume which way it will lean.

Jun 27, 2005 - 10:14 am 34. gumshoe:

“Richard is right, they actually saw

Potemkin Gitmo, or “PoMo”.”

“fake but accurate”,hey?

wouldn’t that be okay?

Jun 27, 2005 - 10:29 am 35. gumshoe:

The last sentence just about says it all: But it will be the worst of bad beginnings to turn it into a place where only grief is acceptable, where the vital impulses represented by the arts are handcuffed in the name of freedom. Surprised? Anyone?

-KS

was it accompanied by an Andres Serrano

S&M photograph?

or did they go for the Mapplethorpe?

Jun 27, 2005 - 10:34 am 36. David Thomson:

ìIf you need proof, read the egregious article by Michael Ignatieff that appeared in yesterday’s NYT: “Who Are Americans to Think That Freedom Is Theirs to Spread?” Take a brown paper sack with you.î

Michael Ignatieff is associated with Harvard University—and that might be all you need to know. Does this university hate America? Well, Harvard certainly does not love this country:

ìOf course the hardest part of writing “Harvard Hates America” was getting it published; established publishers wouldn’t touch it! The editors were all liberals ñ many had attended Harvard ñ and in those days conservative books just were not getting published.

But God had a plan and brought me to Henry Regnery, the publisher of Bill Buckley’s epic book, “God and Man at Yale.”

Mr. Regnery loved my book and agreed to publish it ñ and to heavily promote it.

It sold very well and earned widespread publicity.

We are now 26 years later, and guess what?

Nothing has changed!î

http://www.newsmax.com/archives/articles/2005/3/31/35851.shtml

ìIf Kushner crafts the narrative of the screen play I think one can presume which way it will lean.î

I never before knew about Tony Kushnerís anti-Israel sentiments. Of course, he is a liberal—and too many folks think the enemy is always to the right. They get hung up on Pat Buchanan and ignore the often far more dangerous utopian liberals.

Jun 27, 2005 - 10:36 am 37. Buddy Larsen:

Wretchard has some thoughts on the NYTimes essay that ahem links above (snip):

“Ignatieff’s oddest choice of words is to characterize Kerry as a realist and George Bush as a gambler, as if there were any certainty to be derived from sitting back passively, as he accuses the Liberals of doing; as if there were any recklessness to warring on enemies who had warred on you. “The real truth about Iraq is that we just don’t know — yet — whether the dream will do its work this time. This is the somber question that hangs unanswered as Americans approach this Fourth of July.” But that’s what freedom is: the ability to ask a question and not be afraid of the answer.”

Jun 27, 2005 - 10:53 am 38. Kyda Sylvester:

Tony Kushner??! Has Spielberg lost his mind? Never mind that Kushner is a lefty hack, he’s a hack.

I’m strongly thinking about giving War of the Worlds a pass, since these buffoons don’t need the validation.

I was looking forward to it, less now that I’ve I read this from Reuters:

The director said he did not aim to turn the movie into a political polemic.

“There are politics underneath some of the scares, and some of the adventure and some of the fear,” he admitted, “but I really wanted to make it suggestive enough so everybody could have their own opinion.”

That and the fact that I didn’t know till now that Tim Robbins is one of the stars.

Jun 27, 2005 - 11:13 am 39. Oyster:

I’ll tell ya. Up until recently, I would have begged to be in an Irish prison more than anywhere in the world. I had considered flying over there just to rob a bank. I checked the menu though. No okra.

Jun 27, 2005 - 11:15 am 40. PeterUK:

Dear Infidels,Peace be upon you and blessings on your first born.

I write to you to protest the infamous descrimmination and cruelty that the Great Satan is subjecting the true believers to.

I have a letter from the second cousin of my wife,Peace be on her where ever she may be,recounting the food inflicted on our Jihadi warriors,Peace etc.

It is a crime against all humanity that the food at the Guantanamo Pit of Hell is not available to all of the Jihad.

Chicken with orange sauce, rice and okra? I sit in may cave,whence I have sojourned for several years,where I have existed on goat stew.Now I am reduced to the one remaining goat..but she has such beautiful soulful eye,liquid like the moon upon water,we have been together so long and it very lonely up here in the mountains….but I digress.

In the great cause of the Jihad I have reduced myself to a lithe 115 pounds,I am ready to wreak vengeance or your vaunted Guantanamo,though I demand the Okra is boiled well since I have a little dental problem,as all great Jihadis do,all the more to infect the infidel.

Instruct your finest barbers that my beard will require the most respectful attention,I demand that the little creatures put there by the Israeli secret service be removed and exterminated.

The you must in peril of your life forward the weeks menu of the Club Gitmo cuisine and have Christina Aguilera bathed and sent to my tent.

Sheik Osama bin Hidin

Jun 27, 2005 - 11:20 am 41. Charlie (Colorado):

Soooo…down it goes, to blend with the hundred previous Party-amping people-frauding once-a-month conspiracies already fermenting brim-full in their dank overheated stygian bedlam of a Hieronymous Bosch Memory Hole.

Wow.

Jun 27, 2005 - 11:26 am 42. Buddy Larsen:

Dear Sheik bin Hidin’,

Thank you for your kind inquiry. At present, we are regretfully unable to accommodate your desires to sojourn at the Gitmo facility.

However, our two senators from Massachusetts are both in possession of a half dozen large mansions per each, and have voiced so many humanitarian concerns for your comfort that we are certain that either of them will be thrilled to host your and Mrs. Goat’s visit to the wonderful land of Great Satan.

Since you have evinced some interest in the bill of fare, we would suggest you and the Mrs. fly straight in to Hyannisport, or perhaps I should say, fly in and land on the airstrip. Or, should there be problems with boarding an airline, you might take the overland “backpack” route across the North Pole and down the eastern coast of the Canadian Union of Soviet Chinese Socialist People’s Republics Eh, and thence on to the Kennedy Compound Interest.

Pardon speculation on our part but the groceries are seemingly in good supply at the Senator’s residences. An added benefit of the overland route is that the Mrs. can be outfitted with, and pull, a small dog-sled to aid in the transport of your luggage (we’d imagine that knives, guns, bombs, drugs, and porno videos make quite a hefty “carry”!).

If you depart cave fairly expeditiously, the arctic temperatures will aid you in combing the Mossad nano-agents out of your beard, as the little guys will have insufficient time to knit themselves overcoats and will hence no doubt parachute out somewhere near the 50th to 55th latitudes.

Looking forward to seeing you!

Signed, Howard Dean, DNC, “over 5′ tall”.

Jun 27, 2005 - 12:10 pm 43. PeterUK:

Thank you Dean, perhaps I will let you live.Are you trustworthy with goats,or will castration be neccessary>

Jun 27, 2005 - 12:21 pm 44. ahem:

Dear Osama: Funny you should mention liquid eyes. I hear they’re serving your goat on a special Guantanamo Edition of Fear Factor…

Jun 27, 2005 - 12:39 pm 45. Buddy Larsen:

Dear Sheik,

I thank you most grovellingly for your kind dispensation with regard to my life. In gratitude we of the Lollipop Guild will welcome you in song upon your arrival.

And cast away any worries as to the Mrs’ temptations wrt yours truly, as one thing I well-learned growing up in Park Avenue’s “heaven’s kitchen” is to never hitch my Roman chariot mini-replica to a homicidal maniac’s goat. Whether the couple is technically married or not. Suffice to say, that lesson, once-learned, is not soon forgotten, LOL-NOT!

Perhaps of a morning we can scream together?

Yours sincerely, Howie

Jun 27, 2005 - 12:40 pm 46. lindenen:

Kyda Sylvester, the website where I read this isn’t working currently, so here’s a link to the google cache:

ìAnd now, as we see American adventure abroad,î he [David Koepp] continues ìin my mind itís certainly back to itís original meaning, which is that the Martians in our movie represent American military forces invading the Iraqis, and the futility of the occupation of a faraway land is again the subtext.î

Koepp is the screenwriter. Have a nice day!

Jun 27, 2005 - 12:41 pm 47. Mike D in SC:

Dang, and I was gonna invite y’all to come to the Okra Strut this Fall.

Jun 27, 2005 - 12:44 pm 48. PeterUK:

Dear Howie,or can I call you Dhimmi Dean?

I believe you have friends in what you Infidels the media,there is a market for this Gitmo Diet and a Mr S has offered to finance a chain of restaurants,but we need a slogan.I have been informed that “Eat at Osama’s or Burn in the Bowels of Hell” lacks,as my friend Jacques says,”A certain foi gras”.Always one for the bon mot Jacques.

Jun 27, 2005 - 1:07 pm 49. Terrye:

Osama:

I love my men big and strong and homicidal.

And I am better than a goat.

Jun 27, 2005 - 2:51 pm 50. triticale:

Not only do I love okra but I also like pickled beets. Duh gustibus and all that.

Jun 27, 2005 - 3:03 pm 51. PeterUK:

Ah my doe eyed temptress,but do you know a thousand and one recipes for okra?

Jun 27, 2005 - 3:05 pm 52. Not Jose Marti:

Fried okra ummm good.

Here’s my quick serenade to the Dems from last week, but would MUCH rather have the “Guantanamoron” version to teach to grandkids one day. (Original lyrics to get the Ballardeers rolling.)

Yo soy un hombre insincero/ de donde hablan los burros

Yo soy un hombre insincero/ de donde calumnian los asnos

Y antes de morirme quiero/ echar mi rebuzno desalmado.

Guantanadonkey/ Dem Guantanadonkey

Guantanadonkey/ detestable Guantanadonkey.

Cultivo la mentira blanca/ en junio como en enero

Cultivo la mentira de sangre/ en el NYT, AP y al-Jazeera

Contra el soldado americano/ que nos da su vida preciosa.

Gauntanadurbin/ Dick Guantanadurbin

Guantanadurbin/ Donk Guantanadurbin.

Y para el cruel que desea arrancar/ nuestra libertad con que vivimos

Y para el jihadi que ama de odiar/ la corazon del mundo

Cardo ni ortiga cultivo/ cultivo propaganda que ayudale.

Guantanadhimmi/ Dick Durbin Guantanadhimmi

Guantanadhimmi/ Dick Donk Guantanadhimmi.

Jun 27, 2005 - 4:02 pm 53. PeterUK:

This is the Maison Osama Okra menu http://www.house.gov/hasc/pressreleases/2005/GTMO-menu.pdf

via LGF pdf

Jun 27, 2005 - 4:51 pm 54. richard mcenroe:

Lindenen — Thanks, that’ll save me $20 and a couple of hours.

Let’s see, an unprovoked attack launched on defenseless civilians and the FIRST thing this dungfooted trull thinks of is the US Army in Iraq. Oooookay…

Jun 27, 2005 - 4:51 pm 55. PeterUK:

Ah well, another classic book down the pan.

Jun 27, 2005 - 5:17 pm 56. Buddy Larsen:

Not Jose Marti, you’ve turned a trifle into something quite moving–to me anyhoo (here’s my best ’sense of’ translation):

I am a liar/from the land of talking donkeys/

I am a lying man/from where the asses all slander/

and before I pass from view/I want to bray out my heartlessness…

(chorus)

I make up “innocent” lies/all the year long/I make up blood lies/for the NYT, AP and al-Jazeera/

against the American soldier/who gives his precious life for us…

(chorus)

And for the cruel who wish to trade/the Liberty which gives us life/to jihadi who love to hate/the very heart of the world/for a bunch of thistles and nettles/and the made-up lies which sustain them…

(chorus)

Thanks, Not Jose Marti (hero of Cuban independence, hero of Ronald Reagan) Sorry for the clunky translation.

Jun 27, 2005 - 5:21 pm 57. richard mcenroe:

Actually, if you want a better take on this story, read Sherlock Holmes’ War of the Worlds, by William and Manley Wade Wellman, in which the characters of the Doyle canon (Holmes and Challenger in particular) experience Wells’ Martian invasion. The book has an hilarious postscript in the form of an indignant letter to Wells from Dr. Watson, in which he chastizes Wells (”an admitted socialist”) of falsifying the conduct of the British military and failing to support the war effort…

Jun 27, 2005 - 5:25 pm 58. richard mcenroe:

There’s also Howard Waldrop’s “Night of the Cooters” in which the Martians make the mistake of invading a Texas town in the Wild West…

Jun 27, 2005 - 5:26 pm 59. Not Jose Marti:

Terrific translation, Buddy! Now please write your brilliant version of “Guantanamorons” as a founding member of Buddy and the Ballardeers.

If you pardon my incompetent Spanish, I was trying for “for the cruel one who loves to hate the very heart of the world, I don’t cultivate thistles or nettles, but propaganda to help him”.

Jun 27, 2005 - 5:42 pm 60. Buddy Larsen:

You know, you’re right, NJM, my ’speaker’ falls out of character in the third stanza. Oh well. The actual melody is really lovely, maybe I’ll try to shape the words to the melody better, and keep the same voice. Maybe then we can get Terrye to sing it to her Senator?

Jun 27, 2005 - 5:53 pm 61. Rick Ballard:

Terrye has Bayh and Lugar. I don’t recall any commenters from Illinois.

Anyway – polish it a bit Buddy and ship it off to the guy that does the parody work for Rush.

I think switching the chorus to:

Guantanamorons son todos Guantanamorons

scans OK. I like the rest of NJM’s lyrics but we need some help in verifying the colloquialisms. Maybe Mark in Mexico will stop by.

Jun 27, 2005 - 6:07 pm 62. Buddy Larsen:

Good idea…Terrye not Illinois? There is a Chicagoan somewhere…but, can he sing?

Jun 27, 2005 - 6:18 pm 63. Rick Ballard:

Guantanamorons son todos Guantanamorons

Guantanamorons que mierda Guantanamorons

Needed to finish the couplet.

Jun 27, 2005 - 6:25 pm 64. Rick Ballard:

Yo soy un hombre que miente/ de donde hablan los burros

Yo soy un hombre que miente/ de donde calumnian los asnos

Y antes de morirme quiero/ echar mi rebuzno desalmado.

Guantanamorons son todos Guantanamorons

Guantanamorons que mierda Guantanamorons

Cultivo la mentira blanca/ en junio como en enero

Cultivo la mentira de sangre/ en todos los medios

Contra el soldado americano/ que nos da su vida preciosa.

Guantanamorons son todos Guantanamorons

Guantanamorons que mierda Guantanamorons

Y para el cruel que desea arrancar/ nuestra libertad con que vivimos

Y para el jihadi que ama de odiar/ la corazon del mundo

Cardo ni ortiga cultivo/ cultivo propaganda que ayudale.

Guantanamorons son todos Guantanamorons

Guantanamorons que mierda Guantanamorons

That look OK, NJM?

Jun 27, 2005 - 6:48 pm 65. Not Jose Marti:

Rick,

No accents, tildes or upside down punctuation here, but si, senor, esta bien! The next song desecration can be in Italian for you to do with no need of an idiomatic check-up.

(After years of piano lessons and competitions, might I have keyboard? They should go to something, and a make-believe virtual cyber band sounds better than nothing. Who here plays the guitar?)

Jun 27, 2005 - 7:09 pm 66. triticale:

Okra recipes were requested. I see that as an excuse to link whore.

Jun 27, 2005 - 7:12 pm 67. chuck:

Oh. My. God. The senators missed this.

Jun 27, 2005 - 7:34 pm 68. Buddy Larsen:

Jeez, saw Roger’s addendum, somehow I missed The re-translation…that’s really nice stuff, NJM & Rick. I’m an “ear” piano player (& wot a headache you get, *groan*) plus blues harp (piano wouldn’t fit in shirt pocket). I mean…if anybody wants to know…er….

Roger, your “made me cry” story, that’s really the story, sadness that hangs over the island, sadness for the people. So many never-lived lives now forever gone. Your friend, and all like him, all the people who coulda been somebody, coulda been contenders, gone. Instead, just silence, and waiting, waiting, waiting. Nasty political system, as bad as it can be without being quite bad enough. Too damned sad.

Jun 27, 2005 - 10:14 pm 69. Katherine:

Honey glazed chicken? Lemon baked fish?! 2500 calories a day?!!!!Ö.

Come on, can we at least starve those terrorist bastards just a bit?

Jun 27, 2005 - 10:22 pm 70. obiwon:

Thanks for bringing some much-needed perspective to the discourse (as Glenn Reynolds notes). The more commentary we see such as yours, the more irrational the critics appear when they insist on using the cliched “Hitler” or “Stalin” comparisons.

I was struck by the extreme lack of perspective when I heard Winston Churchill’s “Their Finest Hour Speech” on the radio while driving around yesterday. As Churchill eloquently described the danger facing the world on the edge of a Hitler-dominated new world order, I couldn’t help wondering how anyone could think that America was the dark force pushing the world into a new “Dark Age.” Would defeating America truly usher the world into “bright uplands”? How anyone could take a path of argumentation that could just possibly lead to viewing Al-Qaeda or the Iraqi terrorists as today’s British soldiers fighting with honor so that history will forever remember them as having prevailed in “their finest hour”?

Again, thanks for the perspective. This debate needs it.

Jun 27, 2005 - 10:45 pm 71. AST:

Reading Harry Potter to him? I’ll bet he was chained to the floor without bathroom breaks. Torture!

Next they’ll be screening the entire Lord of the Rings movies (extended version) without letting them go to the lobby to buy popcorn and a coke. Or even to the restroom.

If they really want to punish them, they should force them to watch C-Span whe Congress is insession. Just the procedure (Mr. Chairman, I suggest the lack of a quorum.) I’d gnaw off my own foot.

Jun 27, 2005 - 10:47 pm 72. Buddy Larsen:

Hire Barry Manilow and Kenny G to interrogate them. Have Barry sing the questions, with the Kenny G sax accompanying.

Jun 27, 2005 - 11:48 pm 73. Terrye:

Yes I am from Indiana, although I did consdier lying aoubt that when I called Durbin’s office and got his perturbed lady on the phone.

uh huh… huh uh… ok then…. so…well I will pass it along. sigh.

sheesh.

I heard that a parliamentary leader in Iraq was killed along with his bodyguard and son.

Imagine that contrast. Our reps shoot their mouths off on Cspan, feeling all safe and sound and smarmy and yet they show minimal respect for the reps over there who risk life and limb for the job.

Jun 28, 2005 - 3:59 am 74. Knucklehead:

AST,

Next they’ll be screening the entire Lord of the Rings movies (extended version) without letting them go to the lobby to buy popcorn and a coke. Or even to the restroom.

You need to take your cues from Scarface here.

“Firss you turn on Lord of da Rings. Den you get dem da giant coke an’ popcorn buckets. Den you don’ let ‘em use da ressroom.”

Jun 28, 2005 - 5:46 am 75. Bruce W.:

Rick and NJM:

Need a special version of the same song for Gitmo’s Sunday night chinese food specials:

Yo era un hombre terrible/ que mataba judios y cristianos

Yo era un hombre de osama/ de donde nunca ducharse

Pero ya soy cambiado/ porque la comida aqui es buena

Won-Ton and Eggrolls,

Yo quiero Won-Ton and Eggrolls.

Jun 28, 2005 - 7:32 am 76. Not Jose Marti:

I like, Bruce W! Can you work in a “Gitmo” or “Git mo’” refrain for second helpings?

Jun 28, 2005 - 8:06 am 77. Cecil Turner:

The thing that struck me about the story was the last paragraph:

Bush declared the detainees “enemy combatants,” affording them fewer rights than prisoners of war under the Geneva Conventions. Some detainees have been held for three years without being charged with any crimes.

Is it just me, or is the MSM’s obvious inability to grasp the difference between an “enemy combatant” and an “unlawful combatant,” and apparent belief that POWs have to be charged with a crime in order to be held, cause for despair?

And I think we need some good vibes for balance. Howzabout:

He-ge-mon vibration, yeah. Positive!

Got to show de good side . . .

Jun 28, 2005 - 8:27 am 78. Bruce W.:

NJM: Can you work with this? (sorry for mediocre (at best) Spanish)

Puedo “Git Mo” poo poo platter?/Era “skinny” pero ya soy “fatter”

Te imploro clemencia/ a quedar me en residencia

No me quito de Gitmo/ porque me gusta arroz Chino

Jun 28, 2005 - 8:27 am 79. Not Jose Marti:

Perfecto. And pretty damn funny, Bruce W.

Jun 28, 2005 - 8:41 am 80. PJ:

Great lyrics, guys. Weird Al Y is eating his heart out! Perhaps a parody band is the best approach to defeating the congressional lunacy. It’s the folk singing for a new generation…

Jun 28, 2005 - 8:57 am 81. Rick Ballard:

Bruce W.,

Puedo “Git Mo” poo poo platter?/Llegue muy flaco pero ahora soy mas gordo.

The accents just don’t come through for me.

Jun 28, 2005 - 9:45 am 82. Bruce W.:

Rick: yes, that line was a tortured effort at Spanglish (using “Gitmo” for “get more”) and rhyming.

Much more satisfied with the 2nd line (given my broken spanish).

Jun 28, 2005 - 10:20 am 83. Buddy Larsen:

Won Ton and eggrolls…

ROTFLMAO

Jun 28, 2005 - 10:43 am 84. Not Jose Marti:

Really good, Rick. Maybe “Llegue muy flaco, mas ahora soy gordito” to save a syllable.

Jun 28, 2005 - 10:53 am 85. Knucklehead:

Are you guys copyrighting this stuff? I think Roger owns the IP. Is Sergio Mendes still alive? We could have Sergio Mendes and the Brazil ‘05. Oops, sorry, I forgot, its Buddy Larsen and The Ballardeers Featuring This Ain’t Yo Mamma’s Jose Marti

Jun 28, 2005 - 10:59 am 86. Bruce W.:

“We could have Sergio Mendes and the Brazil ‘05. Oops, sorry, I forgot, its Buddy Larsen and The Ballardeers Featuring This Ain’t Yo Mamma’s Jose Marti”

(and B_W on drums)

Jun 28, 2005 - 11:30 am 87. Buddy Larsen:

Boy, did I ever slip into the Ricky Ricardo role–Rick’s title, NJM’s lyrics–and I get the front job! Ah well, life ain’t fair, peasants!

Jun 28, 2005 - 1:01 pm 88. Kevin P:

Roger:

Okra is ok. Lima beans would justify Durbin’s comparison to the Gulag.

Kevin Peters

Jun 28, 2005 - 1:36 pm 89. Knucklehead:

Lima beans! You had to say it, didn’t you, Kevin. You know full well that The Evil, Masochistic, Rumsfeldian Rumsfeld will never be able to resist the sick temptation to feed the poor, oppressed, tortured souls languishing in Gitmo great steaming heaps of lima beans.

There’s no end to horror!

Jun 28, 2005 - 2:01 pm 90. Buddy Larsen:

dice an onion and a can of Spam, brown in a frying pan, dump two cans of lima beans on top, ya got a 5-minute one-pot meal, no dishes except the pan if you eat off the stove top. Yum yum.

Jun 28, 2005 - 2:22 pm 91. Knucklehead:

dice an onion and a can of Spam, brown in a frying pan, dump two cans of lima beans on top, ya got a 5-minute one-pot meal, no dishes except the pan if you eat off the stove top. Yum yum.

You are a very sick man, Mr. Larson. May we assume you prep the one pot with lard and/or bacon grease?

Jun 28, 2005 - 2:27 pm 92. richard mcenroe:

Knucklehead… But I like lima beans. Even liked ‘em in the C rats.

Jun 28, 2005 - 4:49 pm 93. Buddy Larsen:

Oh, either will do nicely–or real butter. Spam, diced medium & browned crispy, and slightly carmelized onion, set off the sublime “chalK” flavor of the Limas in a scrumptiously delightful way.

Jun 28, 2005 - 4:50 pm 94. Kevin P:

Buddy;

I don’t think I have ever read the words chalk and sublime in the same sentence.

Jun 28, 2005 - 5:08 pm 95. triticale:

Kevin

The usual place to find chalk and sublime in the same sentence is in tourist literature about the white cliffs of Dover.

Jun 28, 2005 - 6:37 pm

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